
1.原文一致原則內(nèi)容要前后銜接,上下連貫語(yǔ)言表達(dá)風(fēng)格一致。2.正能量原則故事內(nèi)容一定要正能量,弘揚(yáng)社會(huì)主義核心價(jià)值觀。如迷路了但最終一定回到了家;失敗了或遇到困難了,但最終一定成功了;吵架了但最后一定是言歸于好,和睦相處;犯錯(cuò)了,最后一定會(huì)改過(guò)自新,重新做人;賊逃了,最后一定是繩之以法,等等。3.曲折性原則凡是故事都應(yīng)有跌宕起伏,其中人物會(huì)遇到困難或問(wèn)題,但最終能解決。
閱讀下面材料,根據(jù)其內(nèi)容和所給段落開頭語(yǔ)續(xù)寫兩段,使之構(gòu)成一篇完整的短文。續(xù)寫的詞數(shù)應(yīng)為150左右。
It was the httest time f the year in suthern Califrnia. Steve, a star basketball player at the University f Califrnia, with his cusin Zach, had planned a camping trip in the Great Natinal Frest fr their summer vacatin.
The bys packed clthes and supplies int a bag, and began their great adventure with the dg Brady early in the mrning. Upn arrival, Steve pulled ver t the side f the rad alng the bank f the river. “A wnderful place fr fishing,” Steve exclaimed in delight. Zach ndded in agreement. At high nn, the sun was scrching ht. With a gd harvest f fish, the bys marched int the frest with Brady fllwing them.
After a lng walk, they fund a clearing that was ideal fr a campsite (野營(yíng)地). The camp was set up immediately as Steve knew all the tricks f an experienced wilderness camper. An afternn nap was abslutely a special treat in mid-summer. Hwever, the bys were waken up by the fierce barks f Brady. Outside, heavy smke filled the air and wind-blwn flame was skipping frm the tp f ne tree t anther.
The lng dry summer turned the frest int a tinderbx. In a little while, Steve and Zach were inside their tent packing their belngings. “Let’s g! We can make it back t the river!” They headed dwn against the fire-wind in the directin f the river. But Brady barked a sharp warming. Ahead f them lay a thick curtain f smke acrss the track. They wuld never make it thrugh that. Steve was uneasy fr it was hard t find a safe way t escape in the heavy smke.
Brady lifted his head and snuffed(嗅)the smke-laden wind. Next mment, the dg bunded away and disappeared dwn a sharp slpe(斜坡). The bys shuted fr him, but he didn’t cme back. Steve culdn’t blame Brady fr panicking. He himself wanted t run even thugh he didn’t have a clue which way.
Paragraph 1:Steve and Zach hadn’t gne far when there was a familiar bark. Paragraph 2:Brady pulled again, in spite f the by’s disbelief, urgently.
主要是根據(jù)記敘文的六要素弄清文章大意,特別要弄清故事的人物,時(shí)態(tài)(通常是一般過(guò)去時(shí)),事件(故事的起因和經(jīng)過(guò)),語(yǔ)言特色(以便在續(xù)寫時(shí)語(yǔ)言特色前后一致,保持不變),等等。
人物時(shí)態(tài)和事件 語(yǔ)言特色不要變
●那是南加州一年中最熱的時(shí)候?!袷返俜蛩谋淼茉撕托」凡祭椎显趪?guó)家森林公園露營(yíng)。到達(dá)后,他們?cè)诤舆呁O??!裾鐣r(shí),他們走進(jìn)森林,在一塊空地上搭起了帳篷?!竦麄冇龅搅嘶馂?zāi),試圖回到河邊。●然而,在濃煙中很難逃脫?!袢缓蟛祭椎吓荛_了,沒有再回來(lái)。
●... with the dg Brady early in the mrning. ●Upn arrival, ... alng ... ●... in delight. agreement. ●At high nn, ...●With a gd harvest f fish, ...●Hwever, the bys were waken up by ...●In a little while, ...
由續(xù)寫的第一段首句與第二段首句確定第一段的框架。
第二段的框架,由第二段首句與正能量結(jié)尾來(lái)確定。
Steve and Zach hadn’t gne far when there was a familiar bark. (史蒂夫和扎克沒走多遠(yuǎn),就聽到一聲熟悉的狗叫聲。)Brady pulled again, in spite f the by’s disbelief, urgently. (布雷迪不顧男孩的懷疑,匆忙地又拉了拉。)
Paragraph 1:1. 由正文末段結(jié)尾可知,小狗布雷迪跑開而且沒有回來(lái)。接著由續(xù)寫的第一段首句可知,他們聽到了一陣熟悉的狗吠聲。2. 由第二段首句可知,布雷迪不顧男孩的懷疑,又匆忙地拉扯起來(lái),說(shuō)明上一段小狗跑回來(lái)想帶他們離開。同時(shí)可以看出,本段中史蒂夫?qū)Σ祭椎系膭?dòng)作抱有懷疑態(tài)度,不愿立刻離開。 說(shuō)明本段寫小狗找到了回河邊的路,回來(lái)想帶男孩們逃離火災(zāi),可史蒂夫猶豫不決。注意結(jié)尾要與下段語(yǔ)義銜接。
由第一段框架可知,第一段中小狗跑回來(lái)想帶男孩們離開,可史蒂夫有所猶豫。那么本段應(yīng)是火勢(shì)不容樂觀,男孩們跟隨著小狗,最終回到河邊。Paragraph 2:1. 由續(xù)寫第二段首句可知,布雷迪不顧男孩的懷疑,又趕緊地拉扯起來(lái)。2. 由正能量結(jié)尾可知,在小狗的一再堅(jiān)持下以及從火災(zāi)中逃脫已是迫在眉睫,男孩們跟著小狗,最終回到了期待已久的河邊。
在已定框架范圍內(nèi),依據(jù)情節(jié)發(fā)展和生活常識(shí),推斷故事中人物所見、所聞、所思、所說(shuō)、所做等給每段增加5至8個(gè)具體細(xì)節(jié),我們稱之為“58細(xì)節(jié)添加法”。
Paragraph 1Steve and Zach hadn’t gne far when there was a familiar bark. (史蒂夫和扎克沒走多遠(yuǎn),就聽到一聲熟悉的狗叫聲。)
從所給材料結(jié)尾和本段首句可知,小狗跑開而且不再回來(lái),史蒂夫表示理解,畢竟火災(zāi)威脅生命,誰(shuí)料它很快回到男孩們身邊。由下段首句Brady pulled again, in spite f the by’s disbelief, urgently. 可知小狗想帶男孩們逃離。所以本段應(yīng)是寫小狗趕回來(lái)想帶男孩們逃離火災(zāi),可是史蒂夫徘徊不定。因此,本段可以這樣構(gòu)思:
還未走遠(yuǎn),小狗趕回停在跟前,推回斜坡不能理解,拉扯褲子消息明了,遲疑不決記憶猶新,解救叔叔有所懷疑,能否逃離
Paragraph 2Brady pulled again, in spite f the by’s disbelief, urgently. (布雷迪不顧男孩的懷疑,匆忙地又拉了拉。)
從本段首句可知,即使史蒂夫懷疑,因火災(zāi)緊急,布雷迪繼續(xù)讓他趕緊離開。那么,本段應(yīng)是寫火勢(shì)危急,閑不容息,男孩們趕緊逃離,最終在小狗的帶領(lǐng)下,他們成功回到了河邊。因此,可以這樣構(gòu)思:
不顧懷疑,匆忙提示迫在眉睫,急忙逃生走下山坡,進(jìn)入森林改變方向,尋目標(biāo)點(diǎn)筋疲力盡,逼迫前行水聲動(dòng)聽,回到河邊
審讀初稿,注意語(yǔ)義是否銜接,前后是否連貫,事件是否符合邏輯,語(yǔ)言特色是否與前文一致。在修改潤(rùn)色之后,整齊工整地謄寫在答卷上。
Paragraph 1
Steve and Zach hadn’t gne far when there was a familiar bark. Brady came bunding, stpped directly in frnt f Steve and hit him with his head, pushing him back tward the slpe. But Steve didn’t get it. Then Brady grabbed the by’s jeans and started pulling. The message was clear, but Steve hesitated. Of curse he remembered Brady saving his uncle’s life when the dg was much yunger. Was he still sharp enugh t get them thrugh this?
Paragraph 2
Brady pulled again, in spite f the by’s disbelief, urgently. “OK, big guy,” seeing the fire was tuching underbrush nearby, Steve made up his mind. Brady led them back dwn the slpe and int the trees. Several times the big dg stpped. Often he changed directins t find the right way. The bys were s tired but the dg bullied bth bys t g n. Steve was almst numb when he heard it—the wnderful sund f rushing water! They made it back t the river.
1.語(yǔ)義銜接: there was a familiar bark. 與上文語(yǔ)義銜接,表示小狗沒有臨陣逃脫,而是找到路后返回帶男孩們離開;Brady... pushing him back...體現(xiàn)小狗向主人努力提示正確的逃生之路,后文為史蒂夫?qū)Υ说姆磻?yīng)。第一段寫小狗返回帶男孩們逃離,史蒂夫舉棋不定。他想起年輕時(shí)的布雷迪曾經(jīng)救過(guò)叔叔一命,但不知現(xiàn)在是否仍能做到;第二段寫火勢(shì)蔓延,不能再瞻前顧后,男孩們立刻跟隨小狗離開,最后證明小狗正確,成功回到河邊,前后一致。
2.語(yǔ)言風(fēng)格:directly和 get them thrugh this 與材料中的immediately, abslutely和make it thrugh that風(fēng)格一致。3.上下連貫:But, Then ,Of curse和Often等表達(dá),也與所給材料中的Hwever, In a little while, Next mment和even thugh等風(fēng)格一致?!鍪返俜蚝捅淼茉撕托」凡祭椎显谏种幸盃I(yíng)時(shí)遇到了火災(zāi),緊急關(guān)頭中小狗跑開,無(wú)論男孩們?nèi)绾魏敖卸疾换貋?lái)。本以為小狗害怕而逃離,誰(shuí)料不久小狗回到男孩們身邊,帶其回到河邊,男孩們成功得救,體現(xiàn)了故事的曲折性原則。總之,范文符合續(xù)寫三原則。
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