
讀后續(xù)寫(xiě) 動(dòng)作改造公式 ???? TOC \o "1-3" \h \u HYPERLINK \l "_Toc25650" Part1 動(dòng)作三連結(jié)構(gòu)(A, B and C結(jié)構(gòu)) PAGEREF _Toc25650 \h 2 HYPERLINK \l "_Toc21366" Part2 非謂語(yǔ)結(jié)構(gòu) PAGEREF _Toc21366 \h 3 HYPERLINK \l "_Toc16851" Part3 時(shí)間狀語(yǔ)從句 PAGEREF _Toc16851 \h 4 HYPERLINK \l "_Toc30513" Part4 混合結(jié)構(gòu) PAGEREF _Toc30513 \h 5 HYPERLINK \l "_Toc30437" Part5 高考真題句中的動(dòng)作鏈 PAGEREF _Toc30437 \h 5 讀后續(xù)寫(xiě)的寫(xiě)作過(guò)程中,成功的動(dòng)作描寫(xiě),可以交代人物的身份、地位,可以反映人物心理活動(dòng)的進(jìn)程,可以表現(xiàn)人物的性格特征。 相反,空洞、籠統(tǒng)的描寫(xiě)會(huì)使內(nèi)容缺乏生動(dòng)性,使人物形象不豐滿。人物的動(dòng)作或簡(jiǎn)單,或復(fù)雜,都不是一下子就能完成的,細(xì)心觀察都能捕捉到最能體現(xiàn)人物特征的慢鏡頭。因此,在描寫(xiě)動(dòng)作時(shí),同學(xué)們要學(xué)會(huì)細(xì)化動(dòng)作,把動(dòng)作過(guò)程分解成一連串細(xì)微的動(dòng)作,形成動(dòng)作鏈,寫(xiě)出動(dòng)作的連貫性,這樣才能使描寫(xiě)具有畫(huà)面感,使人物更立體。 讀后續(xù)寫(xiě)作文中動(dòng)作描寫(xiě)沒(méi)有頭緒?不知道如何下手?不如拆解動(dòng)作,構(gòu)造動(dòng)作鏈,讓你的動(dòng)作描寫(xiě)既豐富又精彩! 舉個(gè)例子,何為構(gòu)造動(dòng)作鏈?我們先看一句高考樣題范文。 He?stopped?the taxi,?jumped?in with the suitcase and?told?the driver, “Go to the police station, please.” 這句話的意思是:他攔下了車(chē),拿著箱子跳進(jìn)了車(chē)?yán)?,然后?duì)司機(jī)說(shuō),“請(qǐng)到警察局去?!????? ????其實(shí),這句話只是描寫(xiě)了“上車(chē)”的動(dòng)作,然而通過(guò)拆解,細(xì)致地展現(xiàn)了一個(gè)動(dòng)作下的組成部分。其本質(zhì)是避免簡(jiǎn)單粗暴的使用一個(gè)動(dòng)詞概括整個(gè)動(dòng)作,而是用2-3個(gè)動(dòng)詞組合進(jìn)行描述。用一個(gè)公式進(jìn)行總結(jié)以上例句,如下: 上車(chē)=攔車(chē)+上車(chē)+告訴目的地 再比如2017年高考真題中的一個(gè)優(yōu)秀范文句子。 ?She would?get off?the car excitedly,?laughing?and?dancing?around. 這句話的意思是:她會(huì)興奮地下車(chē),又笑又跳。 這句講的是一個(gè)比較粗線條的媽媽?zhuān)瑒?dòng)作描寫(xiě)完整地描述了這位媽媽下車(chē)時(shí)及下車(chē)后的表現(xiàn),即: 下車(chē)=下車(chē)+笑+跳 ? 這個(gè)訓(xùn)練過(guò)程,需要我們仔細(xì)觀察,結(jié)合一丟丟的語(yǔ)文功底,并進(jìn)行合理聯(lián)想,并多多積累動(dòng)詞。同時(shí),這也為我們提供了兩種構(gòu)造動(dòng)作鏈條的句式: 1. A, B and C(連詞連接動(dòng)詞們) 2. 使用非謂語(yǔ) Part1 動(dòng)作三連結(jié)構(gòu)(A, B and C結(jié)構(gòu)) 我們先看一下“A, B and C結(jié)構(gòu)”。下面我用三個(gè)句子來(lái)說(shuō)明這個(gè)結(jié)構(gòu),每個(gè)例子我將停頓三秒鐘,正在聽(tīng)這個(gè)課程的你,你可以抓住這寶貴的三秒鐘,快速思考,如果是自己來(lái)寫(xiě),會(huì)怎么寫(xiě)?如果剛開(kāi)始覺(jué)得有困難,可以先想中文思路。 第一句:“男孩們跳入湖中嬉戲” 想一想:跳入湖中,這個(gè)動(dòng)作前面或后面會(huì)有哪些動(dòng)作? 跳入湖里嬉戲 =?沖向湖邊?+?脫掉衣服?+?跳入水中 ????The boys?rushed?excitedly to the lake,?took off?their clothes and?jumped into?the water. 第二句,“她抱住兒子” 想一想:抱住兒子,這個(gè)動(dòng)作前面或后面會(huì)有哪些動(dòng)作? ?抱住兒子 =?沖向前?+?蹲下?+?一把抱住 She?dashed?forward,?knelt down?and?gathered?her son?into?her arms. 第三句,“這個(gè)歌手唱歌” 想一想:歌手唱歌,這個(gè)動(dòng)作前面或后面會(huì)有哪些動(dòng)作? ???歌手唱歌 =?掃視觀眾 +?深吸一口氣 + 開(kāi)始演唱 ???The singer?glanced at?the audience,?took?a deep breath and began to?sing. Part2 非謂語(yǔ)結(jié)構(gòu) 下面仍然用三種方式和三個(gè)句子來(lái)說(shuō)明這種描寫(xiě)動(dòng)作的句子結(jié)構(gòu),每個(gè)例子我仍然停頓三秒鐘。 第一種句子模式:-ing現(xiàn)在分詞,凸顯同一對(duì)象同時(shí)發(fā)生不同的動(dòng)作。 第1個(gè)例句,“老人靜坐” ????老人靜坐=坐在夕陽(yáng)下 +?看報(bào)紙 +?聽(tīng)廣播 The old man sat under the sunset,?reading?the newspaper and?listening?to the radio. 第二種句子模式:having done 表現(xiàn)動(dòng)作先后關(guān)系 第2個(gè)例句,“沒(méi)有買(mǎi)到票” 想一想:“買(mǎi)票”這個(gè)動(dòng)作前面或后面會(huì)有哪些動(dòng)作? ????沒(méi)有買(mǎi)到票=?排了很久隊(duì) +?被告知票賣(mài)完了 ????Having queued?for 3 hours, he?was told?that the ticket had been sold out.? 第三種句子模式. -ed過(guò)去分詞凸顯被動(dòng) ?第3個(gè)例句,“孩子們哭了” ???想一想:“哭”這個(gè)動(dòng)作前面或后面會(huì)有哪些動(dòng)作?或者因?yàn)槭裁丛蜃尯⒆涌? 感動(dòng)哭了= 被感動(dòng) + 哭了 Deeply moved?by the story, the children began to?cry. Part3 時(shí)間狀語(yǔ)從句 如when,while,as,before,after引導(dǎo)的時(shí)間狀語(yǔ)從句 ①When?I arrived there, I walked to the door and knocked. ②?As?I waited at the stop, I heard a big noise. Part4 混合結(jié)構(gòu) 動(dòng)作鏈可以和情感,環(huán)境,心理,語(yǔ)言等結(jié)合,形成動(dòng)作面。 ①Burning with anger, he?glared?at me with his big frightening eyes ,?yelling, “You’re such an idiot.” 此處的burning with anger是情感描寫(xiě),glare和yell是動(dòng)作鏈,同時(shí)將動(dòng)作和語(yǔ)言描寫(xiě)結(jié)合在了一起,形成了飽滿的動(dòng)作面,屬于高分表達(dá)。 ②As night was beginning to fall, Jane?saton?the grass,?staring?at the vast sky, frightened and ravenous饑餓的. 此處將環(huán)境描寫(xiě),動(dòng)作描寫(xiě)以及情感描寫(xiě)結(jié)合在一起,形成了飽滿的動(dòng)作面。 Part5 高考真題句中的動(dòng)作鏈 2016.10浙江卷 She ate some berries and then walked along the stream, hoping to find a suitable place to guide the helicopter. 她吃了一些漿果,然后沿著小溪走著,希望能找到一個(gè)合適的地方來(lái)引導(dǎo)直升機(jī)。 She struggled to her feet and headed for the stream. After having some barriers and stream water Jane walked slowly to an open area to wait for her rescue. 她掙扎著站起來(lái),向小溪走去。在遇到了一些障礙和水流后,簡(jiǎn)慢慢地走到一個(gè)開(kāi)闊的區(qū)域,等待她的救援。 2016.10浙江卷 In no timedid Jane rush to the rock,climb onto it and waver her yellow blouse madly. 簡(jiǎn)并沒(méi)有沖到巖石上,瘋狂地?fù)u晃著她的黃色襯衫。 2017.6浙江卷 Seeing the car disappear, Mac and his friends got on the bicycles and continued heading for Alaska. 看到汽車(chē)消失了,麥克和他的朋友們騎上了自行車(chē),繼續(xù)前往阿拉斯加。 2017.6浙江卷 They jumped off their bicycles, took out the knives they had taken with and approached the wolf inch by inch.他們跳下自行車(chē),拿出隨身攜帶的刀,一寸一寸地走近狼。 2017.6浙江卷 It turned around and spotted Mac’s friends.它轉(zhuǎn)過(guò)身來(lái),發(fā)現(xiàn)了麥克的朋友們。 2017.6浙江卷 Facing the four strong men, the wolf might feel threatened, starting to withdraw.面對(duì)這四個(gè)強(qiáng)壯的人,狼可能會(huì)感到受到威脅,開(kāi)始撤退。 2017.6浙江卷 Soon it ran off into the forest and disappeared in the distance.很快,它跑進(jìn)了森林里,消失在遠(yuǎn)處。 2017.6浙江卷 Seeing the wolf and the bicycle lying on the ground, they instantly realized what had happened. 2017.11浙江卷 Calling out David and me, she got off the car,laughed and danced around. 她喊著大衛(wèi)和我,下車(chē),笑著跳。 2017.11浙江卷 Sitting under the dark blue sky around the camp fire, we talked and laughed. 我們坐在篝火周?chē)纳钏{(lán)色天空下,聊又笑。 2017.11浙江卷 We crossed big rivers and vast plains, climbed high mountains and overlooked deep valleys. 我們穿過(guò)大河和廣闊的平原,爬上高山,俯瞰著深深的山谷。 2018.6浙江卷 My dad and I put on our new cowboy hats, got on our horses, and headed slowly towards the mountains.我和爸爸戴上新的牛仔帽,騎上馬,慢慢地向群山走去。 2018.6浙江卷 He kept silent, listened very carefully ,took my horse rein and led the way. 他保持沉默,非常仔細(xì)地聽(tīng)著,抓住我的韁繩,領(lǐng)著路走了下去。 2020.1浙江卷 原文 He stood up, hugged his parents, and smiled, trying not to let his emotions (情緒) get the better of him. 他站起來(lái),擁抱著父母,微笑著,試圖不讓自己的情緒(情緒)戰(zhàn)勝他。 2020.1浙江卷 原文 The boy lifted the last bag onto his shoulder, and flashed a bright smile. 男孩把最后一個(gè)包舉到肩上,露出了燦爛的微笑。 2020.1浙江卷 That afternoon, the three played happily in the living room, tossing toys here and there. 那天下午,三人在客廳里愉快地玩耍,到處扔玩具。 2020.7浙江卷 We yelled at the bear, hit pots hard, and fired blank shotgun shells into the air. 我們對(duì)著熊大喊大叫,用力打花盆,然后向空中發(fā)射空彈。 2020.7浙江卷 I gave her the pepper spray, broke a branch from a nearby tree and held it tightly in my hand. 我把胡椒噴霧給了她,折斷了附近一棵樹(shù)上的一根樹(shù)枝,緊緊地握在手里。 2021.1浙江卷 Dad rushed in, stood still, and then burst into laughter. 爸爸沖了進(jìn)來(lái),靜靜地站著,然后突然大笑起來(lái)。 2021.6新高考一卷 Jeff broke two eggs into a plate and added in some milk.杰夫把兩個(gè)雞蛋掰成一個(gè)盤(pán)子,并加入了一些牛奶。 Jema found the bread and put two slices into the egg mixture. Next, Jef turned on the second stove burner to heat up the frying pan.杰瑪找到了面包,把雞蛋里放了兩片。接下來(lái),杰夫打開(kāi)了第二個(gè)爐子的燃燒器,給煎鍋加熱。 Jenna threw the burnt piece into the sink and put in the other slice of bread. 詹娜把燒過(guò)的面包扔進(jìn)水槽里,放進(jìn)另一片面包里。
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