Step1：精選動詞，精準(zhǔn)描述
練習(xí)：用方框內(nèi)的單詞完成下面的短文，注意使用正確的形式。tell ask call shut reply demand yell cry “Help me!” 1 (叫道) the wman. “I can’t swim.” A little girl ran t the side f the bat and lked int the water. “Just a minute,” she 2 (喊道) dwn the wman. “I’ll g and get sme help.” The girl ran twards tw men standing n the ther side f the bat.“Quick. Cme with me,” she 3 (要求道).
“What d yu want?” 4 (問道) ne f the men. “There’s a wman in the water and she can’t swim,” she 5 (喊道) pulling at the man’s sleeve. The tw men ran t the ther side f the bat. “I’m cming!” 6 (喊道) ne f the men and he jumped int the water. He swam quickly t the drwning wman and held nt her arm. “Stay still and I’ll pull yu back t the bat,” he 7 (對……說) her.
Step2：分解動作，形成動作鏈或者動作面
操作：動作描寫之具象化：將動作細(xì)節(jié)到“怎么做到的”。練習(xí)：補充翻譯具象描寫的內(nèi)容。1.概括描寫：Mac打開車門坐了上去。（2017年浙江高考卷）Mac pened the car dr and went in.具象描寫：麥克毫不猶豫地拉開車門跳進車?yán)?。________________________________________________________________________________
Mac pulled the car dr pen and jumped int the car withut any hesitatin.
2.概括描寫：Jane站起身來，繼續(xù)往前走。（2016年浙江高考卷）Jane std up and cntinued t walk frward.具象描寫：Jane掙扎著站起來，用顫抖的雙腿向前走。________________________________________________________________________________
Jane struggled t her feet and mved frward with her shaky legs.
Scene 1 跳水救人 (A cward)Henry jumped int the river and saved Rbert.
________ the screams, Henry________________the riverside, __________ his clthes and ___________ the water withut hesitatin. He ______ Rbert just as he was sinking the last time. By great effrt, and with much danger t himself, he ___________ Rbert t the shre.
ran/ dashed/ rushed t
brught/ dragged
Scene 2 荒野求救 (2016.10 浙江卷) During an adventure, Jane quarreled with her husband Tm and gt lst in the frest. Then, she tried her best t attract the attentin f the helicpter. Finally, she was saved and reunited with Tm. A few minutes later, anther helicpter flew verhead. Jane tk ff her yellw bluse, thinking that she shuld g t an pen area and flag them if they came back again. Suddenly, A mving dt(點) n the hrizn was sptted. 1. What wuld Jane d? 2. What wuld happen?list the actins and tell the rest stry.
Suddenly, A mving dt(點) n the hrizn was sptted. As it drew nearer, Jane saw it clearly. "The helicpter,"Jane murmured, sprang up and dashed t the center f an pen area. She waved her yellw bluse desperately t it and yelled at the helicpter with full-strength. T her great jy, this time she was sptted. Sn afterwards, the helicpter landed steadily n the grund and Tm jumped ut. The mment Tm's eyes fell upn her, Jane threw herself int his arms. "Hney, Never will I leave yu again. "Jane sbbed in tears. The reunited cuple hugged each ther tightly.
Tip 3: in+n.：in terrr/excitement/ shck/ srrw/ in a lw(weak/sweet) vicewith+情感名詞：with delight/pleasure/excitement/satisfactin/anger/fearwith +身體部位：with its sharp eyes/ her shaky hand/her pale lipsadverbs: tightly/cheerfully/hpefully/helplessly/ desperately/fiercely(fight) vilently/swiftly
Suddenly, A mving dt(點) n the hrizn was sptted. Exhausted but hpeful, Jane jumped t her feet t catch a clear sight f it."The helicpter,"Jane murmured, sprang up and dashed t the center f an pen area, waving her yellw bluse desperately and yelling at the helicpter with excitement. This time she was sptted, which made her feel mre delighted. Eyes brimming with tears, Jane jumped ff the rck and rushed twards Tm like a flying arrw, hugging tightly in his arms, “please never leave me alne!"
Tip : Chse suitable grammar形容詞作狀語 (修飾句子主語)分詞作狀語（注意分詞與邏輯主語的關(guān)系）定語從句獨立主格（名詞/代詞 + ding/dne/ t d /n./adj./adv./介詞短語）
The car abruptly stpped in frnt f him. Paul put dwn the windw and said,“Cme n, get in the car.”Then, Mac jumped ff the bicycle and gt int the car.“ What a narrw escape!” Mac added. The wlf walked arund the car, but just in vain. Finally, Mac was safe and expressed his gratitude t Paul.
Scene 3 騎行遇狼逃生 (2018.06 浙江卷)） Mac was cycling frm his hme t Alaska with his friends. His friends had t stp t make a bicycle repair, s he pedaled (騎行) alng alne. Suddenly, a wlf appeared, catching up with him. At this mment, Paul and Beeky were driving their car n their way t Alaska and saw the scene.1. Rewrite this paragraph by using what yu have learned.(specific verbs cherent actins suitable grammar )
The car abruptly stpped in frnt f him. Paul rlled dwn the windw and yelled,“Cme n, get in the car.”Frightened, Mac jumped ff the bicycle and dashed int the back seat f the car. “ What a narrw escape!” Mac sighed in a shaky vice. The wlf walked arund the car and hwled at them fiercely, but just in vain. Realizing the wlf culdn't catch up any mre, Mac sighed with relief and sank dwn t the back seat. Paul handed him a bttle f water and he managed a weak smile, murmuring smething like“Thank yu very much”.
Tip: Mre desn’t mean better.
Scene 4 火海救人 Tara, an 8-year-ld girl, was stuck in the firing huse. Surrel, her neighbr wh was 64 years ld, went int smke-filled huse searching but in vain. He ran utside t catch his breath. "Where is Tiara? "he asked desperately.“The secnd flr. "her aunt shuted back.1. Taking a deep breath, he went in a secnd time.______________________
The darkness was verwhelming. Running blindly, he finally made it t the secnd flr, where he was met by intense heat. Breathless and light-headed,"Baby girl, where are yu?"He cried desperately. All he culd hear was the ppping f burning wd. Then a sft but distinct man(n.呻吟) emerged. He quickly crawled twards the sund. Finally, he tuched smething. A she, then an ankle. He pulled Tiara tward him, hugged her tightly and brught her ut f the huse,ttally wrn ut.
Old Man Dnvan（人物） was a mean man wh hated children. He threw rcks at them and even sht at them with a shtgun. At least that's what we had heard. His small farm（地點） brdered ur neighbrhd where my yunger sister, Leigh Ann, and I lived when we were grwing up. His farm was lng, narrw, and quaint. It held tw treasures. One was his beautiful fruit. There were many varieties f fruit: pears, apples, and lts mre I just can't think f. The fruit naturally drew the children t his land. It made them int thieves. But my sister and I（人物） didn't dare t take his fruit because f the hrrible rumrs we had heard abut Old Man Dnvan.
Dnvan 這個老人討厭孩子，對小孩子十分不友好
D有個farm在我家附近 他家水果好吃
水果種類的，很多孩子去偷水果，但是我和妹妹不敢偷
One summer day, we were playing in a nearby field. It was time t head back hme. My sister and I were feeling very daring that day. There was a shrt cut t ur huse that went thrugh the Dnvan farm. We thught he wuldn't be able t see us run acrss his prperty arund the luscius fruit trees. We were almst thrugh the farm when we heard, "Hey, girl!" in a gruff, lw vice. We stpped dead in ur tracks! There we were, face t face with Old Man Dnvan. Our knees were shaking. We had visins f rcks punding ur bdies and bullets piercing ur hearts. "Cme here, " he said, reaching up t ne f his apple trees. Still shaking, we went ver t him. He held ut several ripe, juicy, red apples. "Take these hme, " he cmmanded. We tk the apples with surprised hearts and ran all the way hme. Of curse, Leigh Ann and I ate the apples.
有一天我和妹妹偷偷地穿過D的farm要回家，突然被D叫住了，我和妹妹渾身發(fā)抖嚇傻了。
令我們吃驚的是，他主動給我們水果吃。
As time went n, we ften went thrugh Old Man Dnvan's farm, and he kept n giving us mre luscius fruit.（事件） One day, we stpped by t see him when he was n his frnt prch. We talked t him fr hurs（事件）. While he was talking, we realized that we had fund the ther hidden treasure: the sweet, kind heart hidden behind his gruff vice. Sn, he was ne f ur favrite peple t talk t. Unfrtunately, his family（人物） never seemed t enjy ur cmpany. They never smiled r welcmed us in.Paragraph 1:Every summer（時間）, we wuld visit Mr. Dnvan and talk t him. Paragraph 2:The next winter（時間）, wrd gt arund that Old Man Dnvan had died.
后來，我們之間的交往越來越多，我們意識到他的另一個寶藏是他的善良。但是，他的家人從來不對我們笑也不歡迎我們。
Paragraph 1:Every summer（時間）, we wuld visit Mr. Dnvan and talk t him. 語言：聊天具體內(nèi)容（雙方分享自己的經(jīng)歷和生活）動作：給我和妹妹摘水果心理：我們和老人相處融洽，內(nèi)心喜悅。他的家人態(tài)度轉(zhuǎn)變。第一段還要引起下文（下文講到老人冬天去世，所以該段要寫到生病/意外等）
Paragraph 1:Every summer, we wuld visit Mr. Dnvan and talk t him. We shared with him ur clrful experience at schl while he kept giving ut his luscius fruits t us as usual. As time went by, we seemed t be mre a family than gd friends and his family gradually came t greet us with a warm smile. But ne summer, we were infrmed that he was seriusly ill and we were anxius and restless, feeling like sitting n pins and needles. The next day, we rushed straight t the hspital t see his health cnditin. Weak as he was, he cmfrted us that it wasn't a big deal. It was frm his family that we knew the truth. Old Man Dnvan had fell frm a tree while lking after the fruits and his head was seriusly hurt and need an peratin. The peratin might nt succeed and it was a gamble whether he wuld live r die.
Paragraph 2:The next winter（時間）, wrd gt arund that Old Man Dnvan had died.心理：我和妹妹的態(tài)度和心情（不愿相信、難過）動作：去老人家中證實了老人去世的消息，給他家人安慰（可以語言也可以動作）環(huán)境：冬天、穿過farm看到果樹——想到了老人（景語皆情語）總結(jié)全文 升華主題（想念老人/不要從別人的嘴中了解一個人）
Paragraph 2:The next winter, wrd gt arund that Old Man Dnvan had died. Hearing the bad news, my sister and I just culdn't believe it until we went back hme and saw his smiling face n the wall. I felt a lump in my thrat, tears welling up in my eyes. The family apprached and welcmed us. "I'm srry fr yur lss." I gave them a big hug. On my way back hme, the wind whistled thrugh the trees, as if murning fr the death f Dnvan. I realized gne were the days when we sat tgether chatting with each ther. I realized gne were the days when we were lucky enugh t have a taste f the luscius fruit grwn by him. Hwever, he left us a hidden treasure—his kindheart, which shall never die away with the passage f time.
1.動作描寫走：She dragged her feet as she reluctantly fllwed her parents.她不情愿地跟在父母后面，磨磨蹭蹭地走著。She slipped ut f bed and tipted t the windw. 她溜下床，踮起腳尖走向窗戶。The minin made a rush fr the dr and escaped frm the scene. 小黃人向門沖去，逃離了現(xiàn)場?？矗篢he whle cmpany is gssiping abut the reasn fr his dismissal. 整個公司都在談?wù)撍幻饴毜脑?。He murmured against the strict rules f the reality shw. 他私下低聲抱怨真人秀的嚴(yán)苛規(guī)則。 Treated s unfairly, she hwled in pain and anger. 被如此不公正地對待，她痛苦而又憤怒的嚎叫。
2. 心理描寫興奮：When the hst annunced that she wn the prize, her eyes twinkled with excitement.（激動得兩眼放光）When the hst annunced that she wn the prize, her heart was thumping with excitement. (激動得心砰砰跳)When the hst annunced that she wn the prize, a wide excitement tk hld f her. (興奮不能自已)悲傷：Upn hearing the bad news, her heart ached, tears streaming dwn her cheeks. (心痛，眼淚直流)Upn hearing the bad news, she, numb with grief, had truble speaking. (悲傷到失去知覺，不能開口說話)Upn hearing the bad news, she felt seized by a burst f sadness and culdn’t help crying bitterly.(被一股悲傷之感控制，忍不住哭泣)
害怕：She turned t me, with her eyes full f hrrr.她轉(zhuǎn)過身來，眼里充滿了恐懼。 Fear slwly creeps upn her.恐懼慢慢地蔓延到她身上。 She was struck with hrrr when...她感到恐懼…… She was chked by fear.她因恐懼而窒息。Her face turned pale and sat there tngue-tied.她臉色蒼白地坐在那里，舌頭打結(jié)。 A fld f fear welled up in her. / Fear flded ver her.他心中涌起一陣恐懼。 / 恐懼淹沒了他。She shk all ver, feeling like sitting n pins and needles.她渾身顫抖，覺得如坐針氈。
3.環(huán)境：The sky is vercast, darkened with glmy cluds.(烏云密布；黑云壓頂)On that dark and strmy night, the waves were crashing and the winds were hwling. (海浪肆意拍打；勁風(fēng)咆哮) The rain came puring dwn, the streams rse, and the winds blew and beat against the huse. (暴風(fēng)驟雨)1. When I was bathed in the sunlight, it felt like the amber-like sunshine was kissing every inch f my skin. (沐浴在陽光下；琥珀色的陽光親吻著全身的肌膚)2. Mist-cvered muntains were dtted with small farms and villages. (點綴著)3. The sund f my ftsteps was accmpanied nly by the gracefully waving reeds. (優(yōu)雅地隨風(fēng)飄揚的蘆葦)

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