語篇是社會成員之間進行社會意義交換的互動過程,是一個有意義組成的語義單位;整個語義系統(tǒng)都在形成語篇。語言有三大元功能,即概念功能、人際功能和語篇(謀篇)功能。在交際的過程中,發(fā)話者運用語言表達人們在現(xiàn)實世界中的各種經(jīng)歷(概念功能)和人與人之間的相互關(guān)系(人際功能),并通過連貫的語篇(語篇功能)將概念意義和人際意義現(xiàn)實化。
讀后續(xù)寫是一種將語言輸出與輸入緊密結(jié)合、旨在加速提高學生語言運用能力的方法。此法的任務(wù)設(shè)計簡單易行,只需將一篇讀物的結(jié)尾抹去,讓學生閱讀截留部分,在理解的基礎(chǔ)上續(xù)寫,補全內(nèi)容?!镀胀ǜ叩葘W校招生全國統(tǒng)一考試英語科考試說明(高考綜合改革試驗省份試用)》(教育部考試中心,2015;以下簡稱《考試說明》)指出:寫作是四項語言技能不可分割的一個重要部分,更是語言生成能力的重要表現(xiàn)形式。讀后續(xù)寫提供一段350詞以內(nèi)的語言材料,要求考生依據(jù)該材料內(nèi)容、所給段落開頭語和所標識的關(guān)鍵詞進行續(xù)寫(150詞左右),將其發(fā)展成一篇與給定材料有邏輯銜接、情節(jié)和結(jié)構(gòu)完整的短文。縱觀《考試說明》的要求,我們不難看出,讀后續(xù)寫的目的不但是要寫作部分與所給材料部分實現(xiàn)情節(jié)上的完整性,更重要要的是要在整體語篇上實現(xiàn)概念功能、人際功能與語篇功能的有機統(tǒng)一,從而實現(xiàn)語篇意義的連貫性。
根據(jù)系統(tǒng)功能語言學的觀點,語言具有人際功能。也就是說,人類可以通過語言來表達人際意義,包括言語在人際互動中的功能及說話人的態(tài)度與判斷等;由此人類得以建立和保持種種社會角色關(guān)系,進而形成人類社會結(jié)構(gòu)。我們先來看一組句子:
= 1 \* GB3 \* MERGEFORMAT ①All right, last time, we did sme practice frm English t Chinese.
= 2 \* GB3 \* MERGEFORMAT ②Tday, we’ll start frm Chinese t English, and we’ll again, similarly, we will start with single sentences and then get int a passage.
以上兩句話從靜態(tài)語言的角度看,兩句話都是直陳語氣,其言語功能都是陳述,表明教師正在提供信息。但是從動態(tài)語言的角度考慮,兩個句子的主語都是we, 都是指正在進行言語互動的人(包括說話人與聽話人),但是兩個句子所使用的時態(tài)不一樣,從 = 1 \* GB3 \* MERGEFORMAT ①句中的過去時(did)轉(zhuǎn)為 = 2 \* GB3 \* MERGEFORMAT ②句中的將來時(will),這表明從言語互動的現(xiàn)場角度看, = 1 \* GB3 \* MERGEFORMAT ①句指向互動人此前進行的信息交換,而 = 2 \* GB3 \* MERGEFORMAT ②句則指向互動人即將進行的信息交換。這種變化中的人際意義特征不僅是動態(tài)的,而且還超出直陳語氣結(jié)構(gòu)所構(gòu)建的言語功能范圍。由此可見,語篇在表達概念意義及語篇意義的同時,還同時傳達了大量的人際意義。
人際意義在語法和語音上主要包括語氣系統(tǒng)、情態(tài)系統(tǒng)與語調(diào)系統(tǒng)三個系統(tǒng)。語氣系統(tǒng)主要用以體現(xiàn)說話者與聽話者之間的交流角色關(guān)系,如求取者還是給予者;情態(tài)系統(tǒng)主要表現(xiàn)交流雙方的社會角色關(guān)系,如地位高者所用情態(tài)值一般較高(如must, surely等),而地位低者則相反(如maybe, perhaps等);語調(diào)系統(tǒng)是口語語篇中體現(xiàn)人際意義的主要媒介之一,不僅能綜合體現(xiàn)交流角色關(guān)系和社會橘色關(guān)系,還能表達發(fā)話者的態(tài)度、判斷等。人際意義在詞匯語法系統(tǒng)的功能矩陣中的體現(xiàn)(如表1所示)。
表1:人際意義在詞匯語法系統(tǒng)的功能矩陣中的體現(xiàn)
例如:
= 3 \* GB3 \* MERGEFORMAT ③A: What d yu think f my dress?
B: Well, the style is gd.
= 4 \* GB3 \* MERGEFORMAT ④A: Where is Jack(the dg)?
B1:He is in bed.
[B2: He has eaten his supper.
B3: His bwl is empty. ]
這兩組對話是日常生活中常見的話題與表達。英語中的語氣詞well可以用來表示說話人要思考一下內(nèi)容或措辭,傳達了B的基本態(tài)度,因此 = 3 \* GB3 \* MERGEFORMAT ③句中的B雖然對衣服的風格給予了好的評價,但是卻在其他方面保留了自己的意見。 = 4 \* GB3 \* MERGEFORMAT ④句的B1比B2、B3的回答都要直接,并且直接表明了B1的直陳式的回答,但是B2、B3的回答則通過動詞短語(has eaten, is empty)
方法策略
2
語篇一旦展開就開始用不同的方法影響讀者/聽者,和讀者/聽者建立不同的關(guān)系,拉進或推遠讀者/聽者。英語讀后續(xù)寫一般采用記敘文,利用敘述的方式來闡述語篇的背景及其相關(guān)線索,并且在原文中還給出了十個提示詞語。讀后續(xù)寫的目的就在于讓學生在讀懂故事的中心意義的前提下,利用相關(guān)策略,補全語篇并實現(xiàn)故事的合理結(jié)尾,在此過程中,語篇的人際意義需要實現(xiàn)連貫統(tǒng)一。這樣才能達到續(xù)寫的目的。然而在實際的寫作中,在把握語篇意義及概念意義的基礎(chǔ)上,學生大多都可以幫作者完成故事的“結(jié)尾工作”,但是故事敘事的角度、作者的態(tài)度、主人公等的情態(tài)、以及整個事件的評價等,還很難實現(xiàn)與所給部分內(nèi)容的有機統(tǒng)一。因此,在英語讀后續(xù)寫的過程中,我們必須關(guān)注語篇的人際功能,從而更加有效地構(gòu)建續(xù)寫部分與前文的意義統(tǒng)一。
2016年10月普通高等學校招生全國統(tǒng)一考試(浙江卷)讀后續(xù)寫試題
第二節(jié):讀后續(xù)寫(滿分25分)
閱讀下面短文,根據(jù)所給情節(jié)進行續(xù)寫,使之構(gòu)成一個完整的故事。
One weekend in July, Jane and her husband, Tm, had driven three hurs t camp vernight by a lake in the frest. Unfrtunately, n the way an unpleasant subject came up and they started t quarrel. By the time they reached the lake, Jane was s angry that she said t Tm, “I’m ging t find a better spt fr us t camp” and walked away.
With n path t fllw, Jane just walked n fr quite a lng time. After she had climbed t a high place, she turned arund, hping t see the lake. T her surprise, she saw nthing but frest and, far beynd, a snw-capped mutain tp. She suddenly realized that she was lst.
“ Tm!” she cried. “Help!”
N reply. If nly she had nt left her mbile phne in that bag with Tm. Jane kept mving, but the farther she walked, the mre cnfused she became. As night was beginnning t fall, Jane was s tired that she had t stp fr the night. Lying awake in the dark, Jane wanted very much t be with Tm and her family. She wanted t hld him and tell him hw much she lved him.
Jane rse at the break f day, hungry and thirsty. She culd hear water trickling(滴落)smewhere at a distance. Quickly she fllwd the sund t a stream. T her great jy, she als saw sme berry bushes. She drank and ate a few berries. Never in her life had she tasted anything better. Feeling strnger nw, Jane began t walk alng the stream and hpe it wuld lead her t the lake.
As she picked her way carefully alng the stream, Jane heard a helicpter. Is that fr me? Unfrtunately, the trees made it impssible fr peple t see her frm abve. A few minutes later, anthr helicpter flew verhead. Jane tk ff her yellw bluse, thinking that she shuld g t an pen area and flag them if they came back again.
注意:1.所續(xù)寫短文的詞數(shù)應(yīng)為150左右;
2.應(yīng)使用5個以上短文中標有下劃線的關(guān)鍵詞語;
3.續(xù)寫部分分為兩段,每段的開頭語已經(jīng)為你寫好;
4.續(xù)寫完成后,請用下劃線標出你所使用的關(guān)鍵詞語。
Paragraph 1:
But the helicpter didn’t cme back again, and the day became darker. ________
___________________________________________________________________
Paragraph 2:
Jane wke up at the daybreak. ________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________
基于以上認識,下面我將以2016年10月普通高等學校招生全國統(tǒng)一考試(浙江卷)讀后續(xù)寫試題的解讀為例,探索如何在讀后續(xù)寫的過程中實現(xiàn)語篇的人際功能的統(tǒng)一。
(一)理清語篇的語氣系統(tǒng)
在語篇層面上,交際雙方對交際角色的理解、相互之間的人際關(guān)系的理解都可以在他們使用的語氣系統(tǒng)反映出來。語氣系統(tǒng)描述和解釋了人們?nèi)绾瓮ㄟ^語氣的選擇生成人際意義,實現(xiàn)語言的人際功能。在這個讀后續(xù)寫的任務(wù)中,作者講述了這樣一個故事:夫妻二人(Tm和Jane)開車到一個湖邊進行野營,途中兩人發(fā)生了爭吵,結(jié)果Jane以尋找野營地點為由走開了;后來,Jane發(fā)現(xiàn)自己迷路了,并且在野外通過自己的努力生活著。故事的結(jié)尾兩端分別給出了首句,需要學生根據(jù)自己對故事的理解進行續(xù)寫。通過對所給的部分的內(nèi)容,我們可以分析出有關(guān)作者以及故事中主人公的語氣的表達(如表2所示)。
表2:作者與故事主人公的語氣系統(tǒng)
語篇中的句子不僅因為它們所表達的事實之間的關(guān)系而連貫,而且還因為它們的意義之間的關(guān)系而連貫。通過對語篇的作者的敘述的語氣系統(tǒng)、以及故事中主人公的語氣系統(tǒng)的變化的分析,我們可以利用通過續(xù)寫部分的兩段話的首句分析得出在寫作過程中,需要延續(xù)的語氣系統(tǒng)(如表3所示)。
表3:續(xù)寫部分的語氣系統(tǒng)的延續(xù)
(二)把握情態(tài)的敘事意義
情態(tài)是句子語義的限定成分,可以反映說話人對命題成立之可能性的判斷。情態(tài)意義可以分為“內(nèi)在”和“外在”(即“義務(wù)”和“認識”)兩種。英語的情態(tài)系統(tǒng)分為情態(tài)化和意態(tài)兩個子系統(tǒng)。情態(tài)化涉及到發(fā)話人對命題的可能性作出的判斷,而意態(tài)則涉及到發(fā)話人對命題的合意性作出的判斷(如表4所示)。
表4:英語的情態(tài)系統(tǒng)
語篇的情態(tài)的交際價值在于為作者/說者自己留有余地,同時也給讀者/聽者提供意義協(xié)商的空間。在書面語篇中,讀者和作者之間沒有真正意義上的面對面的意義協(xié)商,但是情態(tài)系統(tǒng)的存在能運用語篇效果盡力創(chuàng)造出一種讀者參與的話語環(huán)境。根據(jù)以上關(guān)于英語情態(tài)系統(tǒng)的討論,我們可以在續(xù)寫結(jié)尾前,對所給材料中的情態(tài)系統(tǒng)及其表達方式作一個分析(如表5所示),以便能夠在續(xù)寫部分實現(xiàn)情態(tài)系統(tǒng)表達的一致。
表5:讀后續(xù)寫材料的情態(tài)系統(tǒng)分析
(三)關(guān)注敘述的語調(diào)線索
語調(diào)是語篇的精神氣質(zhì)、語言格調(diào);語調(diào)是一個著眼于作者/說者的概念,作者/說者可以利用諷刺的、憂郁的、嚴肅的、文雅的、頑皮的、規(guī)范的、疑惑的、積極的或消極的等語調(diào);與此相對應(yīng)的是基調(diào),基調(diào)是氣氛或氛圍,是讀者/聽者進入語篇情境所呼吸到的氣息,可以是沉悶的、緊張的、平靜的、歡樂的、恐懼的或令人喜愛的等。英語中的語調(diào)類型與語氣結(jié)構(gòu)所體現(xiàn)的言語功能具有關(guān)聯(lián)性;語調(diào)類型還可以表達對可能性、有效性或相關(guān)性的推斷等情態(tài)功能,并能反映出說者的態(tài)度、禮貌程度、確信、冷漠等情感基調(diào)。
在這篇讀后續(xù)寫材料中,作者原文的語調(diào)線索也暗示了本文結(jié)尾的走向(如表8所示),因此分析語篇中的語調(diào)變化,也能為續(xù)寫的結(jié)尾打下很好的基礎(chǔ)。
表6:續(xù)寫材料典型語調(diào)線索的人際功能分析
(四)激發(fā)故事的情感體驗
情感線索是體現(xiàn)的語篇的人際功能的重要方式。情感直接表達作者/說者的站位和觀點、看法和方式,主要體現(xiàn)人際功能的實現(xiàn)是通過現(xiàn)實情感還是非現(xiàn)實情感、是行為起伏還是性情、是高興還是不高興、是安全還是不安全。所以,在分析語篇的材料時,語篇所蘊含的情感及其表達方式就尤其需要我們關(guān)注。用語言表達情感的方式最直接的辦法就是使用情感類的詞匯,但是語篇中還有許多非情感類的詞匯也可以傳遞作者/說者或故事中主人公的情感(如表7所示)。
表7:續(xù)寫材料中的情感線索分析
實踐強化
3
1.閱讀下面材料,根據(jù)其內(nèi)容和所給段落開頭語續(xù)寫兩段,使之構(gòu)成一篇完整的短文。
It was the end f the schl year. Mum drpped me ff at the schl gate and I dashed tward my classrm as usual, withut being aware my German Shepherd, Baxter als jumped ut f the car and fllwed me int the schl. Fr fear that I might be late fr Mrs. White’s class, I just ignred the strange glances and laughter all the way, thinking they had nthing t d with me, until my best friend Ry yelled anxiusly, “Melisa... Baxter behind yu.”
I turned arund. There he was, with his tngue hanging ut and tail wagging happily in the wind. I was rted n the spt. I wasn’t suppsed t bring my dg t schl, but at that mment, it was just impssible t get Baxter back.
I lwered myself and tried t get Barter t cme clser, but he stared at me fr a while, and jumped back. He was waiting fr me t take him utside fr a walk. Praise is always gd, even fr a dg, s I said, “Baxter, gd by. Cme n nw.” Luckily, he ran tward me.
But I culd never hide such a naughty dg under my desk. I lked at Ry helplessly, whse eyes suddenly lit up, “The clset (儲存室)...”
Yes, the clset. A thrill f excitement ran thrugh my bdy. There, at the end f the hallway f this building, just n this flr, there was a small unlcked clset where we culd safely park Baxter. That was really a perfect idea which wuld free me frm my dilemma.
Then, Ry and I ran desperately back int ur classrm. Hardly had we settled dwn int ur seats when Mrs. White came in, bks and papers in her hand.
The class went n smthly. Mrs. White explained sme rules patiently and reminded us t take ntes. I listened attentively. Then smething went wrng. When Mrs. White began t write sme math prblems n the blackbard, quietly, a dg slid in. It was Baxter. Mrs. White turned arund, frzen with shck. “Whse dg is it?”
注意:1. 續(xù)寫詞數(shù)應(yīng)為150左右;
2. 請按如下格式在答題卡的相應(yīng)位置作答。
Paragraph 1:
At this time, Baxter sptted me and ran tward me excitedly.
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Paragraph 2:
I had thught Mrs, White wuldn’t get away with it.
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
【參考范文】
At this time, Baxter sptted me and ran tward me excitedly. He annunced silently t all that I was his wner. With my heart racing and my face burning, I culd see, frm the cmer f my eyes, sme f my classmates lked at me sympathetically. I reminded myself t breathe as I std up, with sweat streaming dwn the back f my neck, and said, “Srry.” I explained nervusly, chking with shame and tears. Baxter sensed my anxiety and began t bark. I tried desperately t calm him dwn.
I had thught Mrs. White wuldn’t let me get away with it. Hwever, Mrs. White didn’t scld me. Instead, she suggested I keep Baxter in her ffice fr a while. She als lent me her cell phne, s that I culd call my mther asking her t pick Baxter up. Because f my teacher’s kindness, the accident turned int an amusing incident. After the class, I made an aplgy again t Mrs. White but she just patted me sftly saying, “It’s OK.” It was the first time I had felt my teacher was such a gentle wman.
【寫作指導(dǎo)】本文以人物為線索展開,講述了在一學年快要結(jié)束的時候的一天,作者的狗Baxter跟著作者到了學校,作者不能把狗藏在桌子下,作者的朋友Ry提議把狗藏在一個沒有上鎖的小壁櫥里,作者覺得這非常完美,就沖回教室上課了,當懷特太太開始在黑板上寫數(shù)學題時,一只狗悄悄溜了進來,懷特太太嚇壞了,問那是誰的狗。
1.段落續(xù)寫:
①由第一段首句內(nèi)容“這時,巴克斯特發(fā)現(xiàn)了我,興奮地向我跑過來?!笨芍?,第一段可描寫作者看見Baxter之后的反應(yīng)。
②由第二段首句內(nèi)容“我原以為懷特太太不會讓我不被懲罰的?!笨芍?,第二段可描寫懷特太太知道Baxter是作者的狗之后的做法。
2.續(xù)寫線索:站起來——解釋——老師建議——作者再次道歉——作者的感受
3.詞匯激活
行為類
①解釋:explain/explicate
②建議:suggest/recmmend
③道歉:make an aplgy t/aplgize t
情緒類
①同情:sympathetically/cmmiseratingly
②緊張:nervusly/tensely
【典型句式】
[句式1] Instead, she suggested I keep Baxter in her ffice fr a while. (由that引導(dǎo)的賓語從句,省略了that)
[句式2] She als lent me her cell phne, s that I culd call my mther asking her t pick Baxter up. (由s that引導(dǎo)目的狀語從句)
2.閱讀下面材料,根據(jù)其內(nèi)容和所給段落開頭語續(xù)寫兩段,使之構(gòu)成一篇完整的短文。續(xù)寫的詞數(shù)應(yīng)為150左右。
It was a warm weekday evening in May last year when my friend Alice and I were n a lng walk arund the university campus. We had met n a university trip in 2019, when I was in my final year and Alice was a master’s student. We lved each ther at nce because we bth lve bks and talking lud abut hw dd the wrld is.
I had brught a bk f mini plays that we were perfrming t each ther as we walked, just fr fun. At ne pint, as part f the merrymaking, Alice set ff a quick run and I tk it as an invitatin t race. We were n a lng pavement when I stuck my ft ut t trip her—I just wanted her t have a tumble (跌倒) s we culd laugh abut it. She fell instantly and I kept n running; it was all part f the jke. But then I heard her screaming. I turned arund and she was n the grund, hlding her right leg. I thught fr a secnd she must be kidding, fr there was n way she culd have hurt herself that badly. But her face was ut f shape in pain and she was making this crying sund.
A man wh was walking by had seen what had happened. He called an ambulance as sn as he saw Alice. Within 10 minutes it arrived. The medical staff had t pick her up and carried her int the ambulance.
I went back t Alice’s huse t tell her sister, wh she lives with, what had happened. We drve t the hspital, even thugh we knew they culdn’t let us in because f COVID-19. Tests revealed that Alice’s leg had shattered (粉碎) in eight places. She wuld remain in hspital fr weeks and wuld prbably be restricted t her bed at hme with a full-length cast fr mnths after that. Because f COVID-19, we still culdn’t visit her. Alice treated the situatin with levity (輕率), telling me nt t wrry because accidents happen.
Paragraph 1:
She spent three weeks in hspital.
________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Paragraph 2:
S I wrte her a stry, a kind f lng-frm aplgy, with Alice as the main character.
________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
【參考范文】
She spent three weeks in hspital. The day she gt ut I went ver t her huse. She was n s much medicine that she was sweating and her head was shaking. She had t make us leave the rm when she needed t be lifted n t the tilet. I felt awful; I wanted t help, but nt in a way that was mtivated by guilt. If it were me in that situatin, I wuldn’t want smene cnstantly pleasing me, begging fr frgiveness. Alice wuldn’t want that either.
S I wrte her a stry, a kind f lng-frm aplgy, with Alice as the main character. It was my way f saying srry withut a display f guilt. I read it t her in persn while we sat in the sun in her frnt garden. Alice is still recvering. The experience has shwn me hw slid ur friendship is, because if there were ever a reasn nt t speak t smene any mre, it’s because f the accident itself. But we were able t make each ther laugh thrughut the whle hardship.
【寫作指導(dǎo)】本文以人物為線索展開,講述了Alice與作者在一次大學旅行時相識,并建立了深厚的友誼,一天,作者在玩鬧時不小心把Alice絆倒,Alice因腿部受了嚴重的傷而被送進醫(yī)院,醫(yī)院檢查結(jié)果顯示Alice的腿骨多處骨折,受疫情影響,作者無法進入醫(yī)院探望Alice, Alice告知作者不必因這場意外太過擔心。
1.段落續(xù)寫:
①由第一段首句內(nèi)容“她在醫(yī)院度過了三個星期?!笨芍?,第一段可描寫Alice出院后作者去看望她的情景。
②由第二段首句內(nèi)容“所以我給她寫了一個故事,一種長篇的道歉,以Alice為主角?!笨芍?,第二段可描寫作者為Alice讀自己寫的信來表達歉意及這次經(jīng)歷帶給作者的感悟。
2.續(xù)寫線索:
去看望Alice——Alice狀況不好——感覺糟糕——讀信表達歉意——感悟
3.詞匯激活
行為類
①發(fā)抖:shake/tremble
②離開房間:leave the rm/g ut f the rm
③道歉:say srry/aplgize
情緒類
①糟糕:awful/terrible
②內(nèi)疚:guilt/feel guilty
【典型句式】
[句式1]. She was n s much medicine that she was sweating and her head was shaking. (由s…that…引導(dǎo)的結(jié)果狀語從句)
[句式2]. If it were me in that situatin, I wuldn’t want smene cnstantly pleasing me, begging fr frgiveness.(if引導(dǎo)的條件狀語從句)
[句式3]. I read it t her in persn while we sat in the sun in her frnt garden.(while引導(dǎo)的時間狀語從句)
3.閱讀下面材料,根據(jù)其內(nèi)容和所給段落開頭語續(xù)寫兩段,使之構(gòu)成一篇完整的短文。
On a Saturday night, I was just back frm rck climbing. That was a very cld night, the mn was high and I was lking frward t getting int my warm bed. My cach, Diana, came up t me as I went thrugh the arches t my drm. She tk me t her hme and tld me that my mther had been hurt badly in a terrible car crash and taken t the ICU f a nearby hspital.
When I reached the hspital, my grandmther pulled me aside and said whatever I did, I mustn’t cry in frnt f my mther.
A nurse pened the dr that led t a wide hallway with machines all arund. My mther’s rm was right next t the nurse’s statin. As I entered the rm, I saw her lying n her side, with her tiny back t me and a pillw between her bandaged legs. She struggled t turn arund but culdn’t. I slwly mved t the ther side f the bed and said “ hi ” in a calm vice, hlding back my urge t cry ut.
Her faces were swllen like a sccer ball, her eyes had huge dark bruised rings, and she had tubes dwn her thrat and in her arms.
Gently hlding my mther’s cld swllen hands, I tried t keep my calmness. She kept lking at me as she hit the bed with her hand. She was trying t tell me hw much pain she was suffering frm. I turned my face away frm her, trying t hide the tears that were rlling dwn my face. Eventually I had t leave her fr a mment because I culdn’t hld in my srrw any lnger. That was when it struck me that I really might lse my mther.
I accmpanied my mther all day lng. She was able t whisper a few wrds, but I didn’t knw what t say. I felt like screaming but I knew I mustn’t. I went hme and cried myself t sleep.
注意:1.續(xù)寫詞數(shù)應(yīng)為150左右;
2.請按如下格式在答題卡的相應(yīng)位置作答。
Frm that night n, my life changed a lt.
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
My mther’s reliance n me changed ur relatinship.
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
【參考范文】
Frm that night n, my life changed a lt. Befre that, I just enjyed being a kid, having t deal with nly unimprtant matters f my teenage life. Nw I wuld feed her, bathe her and even help her t the tilet. It wasn’t easy t d thse things, but it felt gd t be there when my mther really needed me. The difficult part fr me was trying t keep my mther’s spirits up and encurage her t face life psitively.
My mther’s reliance n me changed ur relatinship. In the past, we had many tensins f mther daughter relatinships. The accident threw us int a relatinship f interdependence. I had t help her regain her ability t restart an independent life. She had t learn t accept my help as well as the fact that I was n lnger a child. With ur effrts, my mther recvered miraculusly. We have becme the clsest friends. We genuinely listen t each ther and truly enjy each ther’s cmpany.
【寫作指導(dǎo)】本文以人物為線索展開,講述了作者的母親出了車禍,作者趕到醫(yī)院看到母親,忍住了想哭出來的沖動。此后,作者開始照顧母親,母親對自己的依賴也改變了他們的關(guān)系。他們成了親密的朋友,真誠地傾聽對方,真正享受彼此的陪伴。
1.段落續(xù)寫:
①由第一段首句內(nèi)容“從那天晚上起,我的生活改變了很多?!笨芍?,第一段可描寫作者照顧母親的經(jīng)過。
②由第二段首句內(nèi)容“我母親對我的依賴改變了我們的關(guān)系?!笨芍?,第二段可描寫他們關(guān)系發(fā)生了怎樣的變化。
2.續(xù)寫線索:生活改變——照顧母親——鼓勵母親——關(guān)系改變——成為朋友
3.詞匯激活
行為類
喜歡:enjy/ like
處理:deal with / cpe with
恢復(fù):recver/get well
情緒類
緊張:tensins / nervusness
真誠:genuinely /sincerely
【典型句式】
[句式1] It wasn’t easy t d thse things, but it felt gd t be there when my mther really needed me. (運用了when引導(dǎo)時間狀語從句)
[句式2] She had t learn t accept my help as well as the fact that I was n lnger a child. (運用了同位語從句)
言語層級
小句
動詞短語
名詞短語
副詞短語

信息單位
人際功能
表現(xiàn)形式
語氣
人稱
態(tài)度
評論
詞匯語域
音調(diào)
言語功能;情態(tài)
顯性的選項
態(tài)度修飾語,加強語
各類評論附加詞
表達性詞匯,具有各類文體色彩的詞匯
語調(diào)系統(tǒng)
主體
句子/話語舉例
所表達的人際意義
敘述主體
(作者)
= 1 \* GB3 \* MERGEFORMAT ①One weekend in July, Jane and her husband, Tm, had driven three hurs...
= 2 \* GB3 \* MERGEFORMAT ②With n path t fllw, Jane just walked n fr...
= 3 \* GB3 \* MERGEFORMAT ③But the helicpter didn’t cme back again, and the day became darker.
= 4 \* GB3 \* MERGEFORMAT ④Jane wke up at the daybreak.
作者采用的敘述主體是利用第三人稱。敘述部分多用陳述句,敘述的是過去已經(jīng)發(fā)生的事情;敘述用第三人稱,這表明作者只是一個故事的講述者。通過前述分析可以得出:作者對故事的語氣是直陳式的,其目的在于向讀者“講故事”。
故事主人公
(Jane)
= 1 \* GB3 \* MERGEFORMAT ① said t Tm, “I’m ging t find a better spt fr us t camp”...
= 2 \* GB3 \* MERGEFORMAT ②“Tm”she cried. “Help!”
= 3 \* GB3 \* MERGEFORMAT ③Is that fr me?
這三句話反映了故事的人物Jane的心理變化過程。 = 1 \* GB3 \* MERGEFORMAT ①句與 = 2 \* GB3 \* MERGEFORMAT ②句含有直接引語,并且這兩句是所給的材料中唯一的直接引語。從作者/說者的角度來說,使用直接引語就會有一種“事件重現(xiàn)”的感覺;從讀者/聽者的角度來說,通過直接引語,容易在腦海里建立起一種活生生的形象,會產(chǎn)生一種親臨其境的感覺(俆赳赳,1996)。 = 3 \* GB3 \* MERGEFORMAT ③句屬于人物的自由間接引語(余素青,2013)。該句打破了整個故事的時間序列結(jié)構(gòu),使用了一般現(xiàn)在時,讓過去和現(xiàn)在彼此交叉,再現(xiàn)了人物的內(nèi)心語言及其意識活動(申丹,1991)。通過 = 1 \* GB3 \* MERGEFORMAT ①、 = 2 \* GB3 \* MERGEFORMAT ②、 = 3 \* GB3 \* MERGEFORMAT ③的分析,我們可以看出故事中主人公的語氣變化:從陳述句、到感嘆句最后到疑問句,因而也表達出Jane的從內(nèi)心對Tm的不滿,漸漸轉(zhuǎn)變?yōu)橄騎m的求助,到最后對Tm的理解和思念。
續(xù)寫段落
所給首句
主體
語氣系統(tǒng)延續(xù)
Paragraph 1
But the helicpter didn’t cme back again, and the day became darker.
敘述主體
(作者)
敘述的時態(tài)以過去時間為主;語氣采用直陳語氣,并且重在“講述”,不發(fā)表評論。
故事主人公
(Jane)
由于此段是對原文第六段的延續(xù),并且有銜接文章最后一段的作用,因此,故事主人公的語氣應(yīng)該繼續(xù)沿著第六段中的“Is that fr me”這種疑問而又迫切的心理過程推進。
Paragraph 2
Jane wke up at the daybreak.
敘述主體
(作者)
敘述的時態(tài)以過去時間為主;語氣采用直陳語氣,并且重在“講述”;但是,結(jié)尾部分需要通過“講述”構(gòu)建作者對整個事件的評價
故事主人公
(Jane)
承接續(xù)寫的第一段,此段應(yīng)該是整個故事的結(jié)尾階段,因此續(xù)寫部分需要交代主人公最后整個語氣的變化,以突顯故事的主題思想。
交換物
言語功能
中介類型
實例
信息
命題
陳述,
提問
情態(tài)化
概率
It must be true.
It certainly is true.
It certainly must be true.
頻率
It must happen.
It always happen.
It must always happen.
物品與服務(wù)
提議
命令
意態(tài)
義務(wù)
Yu must be patient.
Yu’re required t be patient.
提供
意愿
I must win!
I’m determined t win!
情態(tài)表達
所屬段落
類別
作者用意
unfrtunately
第一段
與語氣系統(tǒng)有關(guān)的評注性評價成分
表達了作者對所敘述的事實的態(tài)度和觀點
t her surprise
第二段
表示情態(tài)意義的介詞短語
反映了故事主人公的心態(tài)變化,及對新出現(xiàn)的情況的看法
suddenly(realized that…)
第二段
與時間有關(guān)的情態(tài)附加成分
反映了故事主人公對自己所處環(huán)境的理解
If nly (she had…)
第四段
人際語法隱喻(相當于語氣附加成分)
既反映出作者對主人公的遭遇的評價,也反映出了主人公內(nèi)心對自己的處境的評價
culd (hear water trickling…)
第五段
情態(tài)助動詞
反映了故事主人公對周圍環(huán)境的認知
t her great jy
第五段
表示情態(tài)意義的介詞短語
反映出故事主人公的心態(tài)的變化
carefully (alng the way…)
第六段
與動作傾向性有關(guān)的情態(tài)附加成分
刻畫了故事主人公小心翼翼的心態(tài)
(Unfrtunately, the trees made it)impssible
第六段
情態(tài)形容詞性謂語(be impssible t d)的縮略結(jié)構(gòu)
與unfrtunately同時出現(xiàn)在一個句子里,突顯了環(huán)境因素對故事主人公的影響
shuld (g t …)
第六段
情態(tài)助動詞
反映出故事主人公對自己此刻的責任的認識
典型語調(diào)線索
所屬段落
人際功能分析
對續(xù)寫部分的啟示
Unfrtunately, n the way an unpleasant subjet came up ...
第一段
unfrtunately用升調(diào),與用降調(diào)的unpleasant subject形成對比,給人的感覺是說者/作者所表達的心情較為關(guān)切(翟學鳳,2013)。此外,緊接著的angry也用降調(diào),這就進一步突顯了故事中人物之間的矛盾與沖突。
通過這一系列的語調(diào)上的變化,從故事開始的突顯矛盾沖突的降調(diào),到故事發(fā)展中的倒裝句的降調(diào)與疑問句的升調(diào),完整地表達了女主人公的內(nèi)心的“高傲---彷徨---憂傷---振作”這樣的一條線索。那么在續(xù)寫部分的第一段中,從“the day became darker”可以看出,這段話需要承接前一段中的“振作”這一心態(tài),在所用的語調(diào)不能太歡快。續(xù)寫的第二段中的“Jane wke up at the daybreak”告訴我們,既然是一個結(jié)尾,那么此段必然要承接前一段、交代女主人公的一個完整的“認識”上的結(jié)局,因而語調(diào)選擇可以是歡快的。
was s angry that she said t Tm...
the farther she walked, the mre cnfused she became.
第四段
語篇的第二、三兩段是故事的進一步發(fā)展階段,第四段承接前三段,進一步交代了故事的沖突。在這兩個句子中,farther, cnfused, tired與fr the night用的都是降調(diào),強調(diào)了女主人公內(nèi)心的變化,突出了其內(nèi)心的焦慮與不安。
was s tired that she had t stp fr the night.
Never in her life had she tasted anything better.
第五段
本句是倒裝句,整個句子在讀的過程中都要采取重讀、降調(diào)的形式。倒裝句是一種信息重構(gòu)方式(文旭等,2004)。在語篇構(gòu)建的過程中,倒裝句可以用來調(diào)整已知信息和新信息的編排順序、使語篇上下文在結(jié)構(gòu)上銜接、語義上連貫,從而保證語篇信息流的暢通(張克定,2001)。這句話承接上文,交代了女主人公內(nèi)心對生活的當前認識,也為后面其心理發(fā)展奠定了基礎(chǔ)。
Is that fr me?
第六段
這句話是一般疑問句,在朗讀的時候要采用高升調(diào),表達了一種不肯定、不完整或從屬等概念(翟學鳳,2014)。用在第六段中,進一步明確了女主人公“急迫”的心態(tài)。
事件參與框架
敘述效果
對續(xù)寫的啟示
敘述主體
作者
讀后續(xù)寫材料采用的是“作者---旁觀敘述”的方式,利用第三人稱,作者充當故事外的“敘述者”(申丹,2004)。這樣敘述的一大優(yōu)勢在于能夠利用故事中的人物的眼光來敘事(申丹,1996),能夠更好地展示故事中人物的經(jīng)驗。
續(xù)寫部分必須繼續(xù)沿用第三人稱的形式,以在敘述的角度上與前文保持一致。寫作者仍然要扮演真實作者的角色,并把故事的后半部分補充完整。
故事參與者
主人公
Jane
其他參與人
Tm
Tm是Jane最親近的人,helicpter是Jane內(nèi)心存活下去的精神寄托。
續(xù)寫部分需要揭開兩個謎底:一是Jane是否趕上了直升飛機;二是Tm是否也在尋找Jane。
helicpter(rescuer)
環(huán)境參與物
lake
這些空間存在物構(gòu)成了故事主人公活動的場所,即構(gòu)筑了故事空間。故事空間是故事發(fā)展的依托和載體,它是具有特殊功能的創(chuàng)造性的空間,既與故事的情節(jié)內(nèi)容、主題意蘊以及人物的身份等緊密相關(guān),也與其本身所具有的社會功能與價值相連。作者直接把讀者引入故事空間,從而能讓讀者在一種身臨其境的狀態(tài)下聆聽故事(申丹等,2010)。
續(xù)寫第一段是承接原文第六段而來,因此根據(jù)這段話的首句提示,寫作者也需要進一步挖掘故事空間的作用。續(xù)寫第二段是故事的結(jié)尾,也需要承接續(xù)寫第一段的內(nèi)容,因此根據(jù)其首句提示,這段話的中心不能再停留在對故事空間的拓展,而要給出主人公最終的內(nèi)心世界的變化。
muntain tp
water(trickling)
stream
berry bushes
主人公心態(tài)變化
…she said t walked away
敘述語篇的最為關(guān)鍵的因素是構(gòu)建虛構(gòu)人物的內(nèi)心情感(金雯,2016)。文字表述只是主人公內(nèi)心世界變化的記錄,我們要透過這些文字,體會主人公的內(nèi)心變化歷程。在語篇構(gòu)建與理解的過程中,人們一方面用自己的“心”去推測他者之“心”,同時又利用語言系統(tǒng)的公共性、社會性及話語的語境,通過心理因果性的機制,努力把說者/主人公當時的情感、情緒盡可能地還原出來(徐盛桓,2016)。在續(xù)寫材料中,這些反映Jane的情感變化的心理描寫,能夠讓讀者準確地把握主人公的內(nèi)心世界變化,從而能更加準確地預(yù)測故事的結(jié)局。
人類身體結(jié)構(gòu)、心智結(jié)構(gòu)、神經(jīng)結(jié)構(gòu)相似,因而通過身體行為體驗等流露出的情感具有極大的普遍性(徐盛桓,2016)。續(xù)寫者在寫作的過程中,除了要考慮“故事空間”外,就是要抓住主人公的情感變化主線,在準確判斷主人公情感變化的走向的基礎(chǔ)上,通過語言系統(tǒng)準確地把故事的結(jié)局補充完整。
She suddenly realized that she was lst.
“Tm”she cried. “Help!”
If nly she had nt left her mbile phne in that bag with Tm.
She wanted t …tell him hw much she lved him.
Feeling strnger nw, she began t walk…and hpe it wuld lead her t the lake.
Is that fr me?

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專題2.03 虛擬語氣與續(xù)寫-2024年新高考英語讀后續(xù)寫提分技能

專題2.03 虛擬語氣與續(xù)寫-2024年新高考英語讀后續(xù)寫提分技能

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