歷年高考英語讀后續(xù)寫真題分析
My dad, Gerge, nly had an eighth grade educatin. A quiet man, he didn’t understand my wrld f schl activities. Frm age 14, he wrked. And his dad, Albert, tk the mney my dad earned and used it t pay family expenses. I didn’t really understand his wrld either: He was a livestck (牲畜) trucker, and I thught that I wuld surpass (超過) anything he had accmplished by the time I walked acrss the stage at high schl graduatin. Summers in the mid-’70s were spent at hme shting baskets, hitting a baseball, r thrwing a ftball, preparing fr my future as a quarterback (四分衛(wèi)) n a ftball team. In pr weather, I read abut sprts r practiced my trmbne (長號). The summer befre my eighth grade I was ne f a grup f bys that a neighbring farmer hired t wrk in his field. He explained ur basic task, the tractr (拖拉機) fired up and we were ff, riding dwn the field lking fr weeds t spray (噴灑) with chemicals. After a shrt way, the farmer stpped and pinted at a weed which we missed. Then we began again. This happened ver and ver, but we sn learned t identify different grasses like cckleburs, lamb’s-quarters, fxtails, and the king f weeds, the pretty purple thistle. It was tiring wrk, but I lked frward t the pay, even thugh I wasn’t sure hw much it wuld amunt t.
閱讀下面短文，根據(jù)所給情節(jié)進行續(xù)寫，使之構(gòu)成一個完整的故事。
At hme, my dad said, “A jb’s a big step t grwing up. I’m glad yu will be cntributing t the husehld.” My dad’s wrds made me realize that my earnings might nt be mine t d with as I wished. My labrs lasted abut tw weeks, and the farmer said there might be mre wrk, but I wasn’t interested. I decided it was nt fair that I had t cntribute my mney.注意：1. 所續(xù)寫短文的詞數(shù)應(yīng)為150左右； 2. 至少使用5個短文中標有下劃線的關(guān)鍵詞語； 3. 續(xù)寫部分分為兩段，每段的開頭語已為你寫好； 4. 續(xù)寫完成后，請用下劃線標出你所使用的關(guān)鍵詞語。The pay day arrived at last. _____________________________________________________________________I understd immediately what my parents were wrried abut. __________________________________________
材料分析：這篇讀后續(xù)寫以人物為線索展開，講述了作者高中畢業(yè)后，參加農(nóng)場工作，辛辛苦苦掙到的錢，不情愿貢獻給家庭，后來在看到父親的辛勞之后，理解了父母擔(dān)心的是自己太過自私而不知奉獻，終于想通，并自豪地將自己勞動所得交給父親的故事。故事容易讀懂，開放性卻很強，可以發(fā)揮的余地很大。
My dad, Gerge, nly had an eighth grade educatin. A quiet man, he didn’t understand my wrld f schl activities. Frm age 14, he wrked. And his dad, Albert, tk the mney my dad earned and used it t pay family expenses. I didn’t really understand his wrld either: He was a livestck trucker, and I thught that I wuld surpass (超過) anything he had accmplished by the time I walked acrss the stage at high schl graduatin. Summers in the mid-70s were spent at hme shting baskets, hitting a baseball, r thrwing a ftball, preparing fr my future as a quarterback n a ftball team. In pr weather, I read abut sprts r practiced my trmbne (長號).
Wh: My dad, I, a neighbring farmer What: wrk in the farm field hw t use mney I earned
The summer befre my eighth grade I was ne f a grup f bys that a neighbring farmer hired t wrk in his field. He explained ur basic task, the tractr fired up and we were ff, riding dwn the field lking fr weeds t spray with chemicals. After a shrt way, the farmer stpped and pinted at a weed which we missed. Then we began again. This happened ver and ver, but we sn learned t identify different grasses like cckleburs, lamb’s-quarters, fxtails, and the king f weeds, the pretty purple thistle. It was tiring wrk, but I lked frward t the pay, even thugh I wasn't sure hw much it wuld amunt t.At hme, my dad said, “A jb’s a big step t grwing up. I’m glad yu will be cntributing t the husehld.” My dad’s wrds made me realize that my earnings might nt be mine t d with as I wished.My labrs lasted abut tw weeks, and the farmer said there might be mre wrk, but I wasn’t interested. I decided it was nt fair that I had t cntribute my mney.
When: the summer befre my eighth gradeWhere: a neighbring farmer's field at hme
Read fr the plt clue
my dad with little educatin didn't understand each ther my dream t be a quarterback wrk n the farm in summer mney I earned d smething fr the husehld unfair nt t use my wn mney
Read fr the emtin clue:
cnfident
delighted
uninterested
Tw clues in the stry
The plt line
The emtin line
The surface level
The deep level
He ______ _________ my wrld f schl activities.
My dad is a _____ man and he nly had an _____ grade educatin.
He started t wrk frm age ____ and his mney was spent t pay ______ _________.
He thught that a jb’s a big step t _______ ___.
He was glad that I culd earn mney and _________ t the husehld.
閱讀完材料，試著完成下面的故事山吧！
The pay day arrived at last. Hw wuld I cpe with my depressin caused by my dad’s wrds?
My dad and I didn’t understand each ther.
I spent my summer vacatin befre the eighth grade wrking in my neighbr's field and lked frward t the pay.
My father praised me since I culd wrk fr the family. Hearing that, I felt unfair nt being able t use my wn mney and lst the interest in mre wrk.
I understd immediately what my parents were wrried abut. Wuld I understand my dad finally?
2. Build-up
4. Reslutin
研讀兩段的給出句，想想它們給我們提供了哪些續(xù)寫線索？
Para 1: The pay day arrived at last.
“I decided it was nt fair that I had t cntribute my mney” mentined in the text suggests “I was upset”. Wuld this feeling cntinue as the pay day arrived? What happened in Para. 1 t make me “understand immediately what my parents were wrried abut” in Para. 2?
Para 2: I understd immediately what my parents were wrried abut.
What was my reactin after learning abut my parents’ wrries? “I understd my dad, cntributed my mney willingly, learned abut shuldering respnsibilities” all seem gd mrals I gt at last. Hw can the ending be designed t achieve sme r all f them?
由第一段首句內(nèi)容The pay day arrived at last.（工資終于到了。）及時間線索詞The pay day可知，第一段可描寫作者的工資到手后，高興地計劃自己用這筆錢，不愿意交給父親，因此此時應(yīng)該表達開心→失落→不想把錢交給父親的場景。設(shè)問如下：①Which wrds r phrases shuld be fcused n in the given sentence?(pay，arrived )②Hw did I feel when I gt payment frm my wrk?③ Hw did I plan the mney at first?④What did his father say?
二、分析續(xù)寫段首，確定續(xù)寫方向
根據(jù)第二段首句 I understand immediately what my parents were wrried abut.（我立刻明白了父母的擔(dān)心。）及時間線索詞immediately可知，本段一定是描寫我發(fā)現(xiàn)父親的辛勞→突然明白了父母的焦慮→把錢給父母→自豪的場景。設(shè)問如下：⑤Which wrds r phrases shuld be fcused n in the given sentence?(understand，wrried abut)⑥What did I see and understand?⑦What did I realize and decide t d?⑧What’s the end f the stry?
[cherent] para 1 and para 2 {邏輯要連貫}Plt and emtin with apprpriate language
①由第一段首句內(nèi)容“拿到工資”?？芍?，第一段可描寫作者的工資到手后，高興地計劃自己用這筆錢，不愿意交給父親。②由第二段首句內(nèi)容“父親讓我自己支配工資?！笨芍髡唧@訝之余，續(xù)寫內(nèi)容本著正能量的方向發(fā)展，應(yīng)該為家庭有所付出。
續(xù)寫線索：高興 ——不情愿 ——理解 —— 為家庭付出
詞匯激活 ①計劃： prgramme/plan ②.奉獻：give/devte ③發(fā)現(xiàn)： see/find
情緒類 ①.不情愿的：unwilling/reluctant ②.自豪地： prudly/with pride ③.高興的: be delighted t d...
段首：On ding..., His face lit up I suddenly realized that...
結(jié)尾升華：不情愿為家庭付出 明白父母的難處 愿意付出I tk ut my wn mney with pride and was delighted t hand it t my dad. He gave me a tight hug with tears streaming dwn his cheeks.
My dad, Gerge, nly had an eighth grade educatin. A quiet man, he didn’t understand my wrld f schl activities.… I didn’t really understand his wrld either: He was a livestck trucker, and I thught that I wuld surpass（超過）anything he had accmplished …
伏筆指將上文看似無關(guān)緊要的人物或事件作為在續(xù)寫下文時可能出現(xiàn)的人物或事件的預(yù)先提示或暗示，目的達到“前有伏筆，后有照應(yīng)”的效果。
讀懂開頭這兩句可知父子兩人彼此不理解，這是讀后續(xù)寫的伏筆，表達故事發(fā)展從負面情感到積極情感的變化過程（最后兩人彼此理解了）
… Frm age 14. he wrked. And his dad, Albert, tk the mney my dad earned and used it t pay family expenses. …
鋪墊指故事高潮的前奏，如環(huán)境描寫、對話描述等，推動主要人物主要內(nèi)容的展示，幫助制造懸念和矛盾沖突。
這也是讀后續(xù)寫的鋪墊，表達作者父親很小開始工作，而且爺爺拿走作者爸爸所以賺的錢，鋪墊了續(xù)寫的兩方面內(nèi)容：一是作者一家生活很辛苦，二是作者家庭傳統(tǒng)，賺錢上交幫助家庭開支
Summers in the mid-70s were spent at hme shting baskets, hitting a baseball, r thrwing a ftball, preparing fr my future as a quarterback n a ftball team. In pr weather, I read abut sprts r practiced my trmbne（長號）.
這也是讀后續(xù)寫的伏筆，本段通過恰當(dāng)使用一連串的節(jié)奏動詞，生動具體地描述了主人公對體育的酷愛，展示了極強的畫面感，我們據(jù)此可以設(shè)想作者賺錢后一定會得意洋洋地去計劃如何去花錢的故事
The summer befre my eighth grade I was ne f a grup f bys …. Then we began again. This happened ver and ver, … It was tiring wrk, but I lked frward t the pay, even thugh I wasn’t sure hw much it wuld amunt t.
通過began again及happened ver and ver，加上情緒的形容詞tiring來體現(xiàn)作者不肯出苦耐勞，但為了達成愿望的不得不辛苦的矛盾心理
At hme, my dad said, “A jb’s a big step t grwing up. I’m glad yu will be cntributing t the husehld.” My dad’s wrds made me realize that my earnings might nt be mine t d with as I wished.
為后文作者最終把賺的錢資助家用，最終“長大” 埋下了伏筆
My labrs lasted abut tw weeks, and the farmer said there might be mre wrk, but I wasn’t interested. I decided it was nt fair that I had t cntribute my mney.
這里使用精準化動詞decided，cntribute渲染作者因為要把賺錢交給爸爸，感覺工作起來沒有動力，襯托了作者極不情愿交錢給爸爸的心理活動描寫，也為后續(xù)解決沖突埋下了伏筆
The pay day arrived at last. _________________________________________ (雖然我口袋里一共有100美元，我還是帶著沉重的心情回家了。讓步狀語從句和with結(jié)構(gòu)). ______________________________________________ (我多希望用這些錢買一雙自己想要很久的新運動鞋。感嘆句和省略that的定語從句). Nt much was said ver dinner. Hwever, befre I went t bed that night, _______________________ (然而，晚上睡覺前，我無意中聽到從父母房間傳來的談話。時間狀語從句和非謂語動詞作后置定語). “Sam can d withut a persnal ftball cach. Our budget is really tight this mnth,” said my mm. “Dn’t wrry. I just need t d sme extra driving. A prfessinal can help him make great prgress in ftball. Yu knw the by’s future dream,” said my dad. I understd immediately what my parents were wrried abut. _________________ (一直誤會爸爸的人是我。強調(diào)句), nt the ther way arund. The next mrning, I handed Dad my hard-earned cash. It nly seemed fair. But he just tk sme f it. “That’ll d fr nw and thanks fr helping with the family expenses, sn. Yu are really grwing up,” he said. After the talk, I went straight back t the farmer and tk the extra wrk.
根據(jù)括號中的提示，補出范文缺失的部分，并關(guān)注哪些語言回答了“首句精研”的問題。
閱讀以下參考范文，核對一下你是否補出范文缺失的部分。
The pay day arrived at last. Thugh I had a ttal f $100 in my pcket, I still went hme with a heavy heart. Hw I wished I culd use the mney t buy a pair f new sprts shes I’d wanted fr ages. Nt much was said ver dinner. Hwever, befre I went t bed that night, I verheard a cnversatin cming frm my parents’ bedrm. “Sam can d withut a persnal ftball cach. Our budget is really tight this mnth,” said my mm. “Dn’t wrry. I just need t d sme extra driving. A prfessinal can help him make great prgress in ftball. Yu knw the by’s future dream,” said my dad. I understd immediately what my parents were wrried abut. It was me wh had misunderstd my dad all the time, nt the ther way arund. The next mrning, I handed Dad my hard-earned cash. It nly seemed fair. But he just tk sme f it. “That’ll d fr nw and thanks fr helping with the family expenses, sn. Yu are really grwing up,” he said. After the talk, I went straight back t the farmer and tk the extra wrk.
2021年6月浙江卷讀后續(xù)寫——邏輯連貫 (cherent)
Thugh I had a ttal f $100 in my pcket, I still went hme with a heavy heart. Hw I wished I culd use the mney t buy a pair f new sprts shes I’d wanted fr ages. Nt much was said ver dinner. Hwever, befre I went t bed that night, I verheard a cnversatin cming frm my parents’ bedrm. “Sam can d withut a persnal ftball cach. Our budget is really tight this mnth,” said my mm. “Dn’t wrry. I just need t d sme extra driving. A prfessinal can help him make great prgress in ftball. Yu knw the by’s future dream,” said my dad.
重復(fù)、指代、同義替換等 (chesive)
What did I feel when I gt the pay? What made me understand my parents’ wrries?
The pay day arrived at last.
It was me wh had misunderstd my dad all the time, nt the ther way arund. The next mrning, I handed Dad my hard-earned cash. It nly seemed fair. But he just tk sme f it. “That’ll d fr nw and thanks fr helping with the family expenses, sn. Yu are really grwing up,” he said. After the talk, I went straight back t the farmer and tk the extra wrk.
What did I react after knwing my parents’ wrries?
I understd immediately what my parents were wrried abut.
The pay day arrived at last. Thugh I had a ttal f $100 in my pcket, I still went hme with a heavy heart. Hw I wished I culd use the mney t buy a pair f new sprts shes I’d wanted fr ages. Nt much was said ver dinner. Hwever, befre I went t bed that night, I verheard a cnversatin cming frm my parents’ bedrm. “Sam can d withut a persnal ftball cach. Our budget is really tight this mnth,” said my mm. “Dn’t wrry. I just need t d sme extra driving. A prfessinal can help him make great prgress in ftball. Yu knw the by’s future dream,” said my dad.
2021年6月浙江卷讀后續(xù)寫——精彩語言
省略that的定語從句
I understd immediately what my parents were wrried abut. It was me wh had misunderstd my dad all the time, nt the ther way arund. The next mrning, I handed Dad my hard-earned cash. It nly seemed fair. But he just tk sme f it. “That’ll d fr nw and thanks fr helping with the family expenses, sn. Yu are really grwing up,” he said. After the talk, I went straight back t the farmer and tk the extra wrk.
檢測一下你對范文的亮點語塊掌握了嗎？
總計心情沉重沒有……也行取得巨大進步一直，始終目前
最后 想要某物很久了 倒過來 辛苦掙得的錢 家庭支出 徑直走向
a heavy heart
make great prgress
all the time
want sth. fr ages
the ther way arund
hard-earned cash
family expenses
g straight t
Thugh I had a ttal f $100 in my pcket, I still went hme with a heavy heart. Hw I wished I culd use the mney t buy a pair f new sprts shes I’d wanted fr ages. Nt much was said ver dinner. (Para. 1) 本部分從作者的心理活動和外部情景兩方面描寫了作者的憤懣情緒。這種直接描寫和間接描寫穿插使用的方式值得借鑒。

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